Required: some paper plates
Performance Instructions:
Eat 500,000 lbs. of potato salad off of a paper plate...........in exactly nine minutes, no more, no less.
Save the plate and lick it clean, then bite a hole through the center of the plate exactly 1.837 square inches.............the edges must form perfectly straight right angles.
Use the hole of the paper plate as a viewing mechanism to observe a solar eclipse....................and observe 21 solar eclipses within 21 consecutive days.
Close your eyes and cry until you fill up three small butter containers..............and a swimming pool in Montana that is twice the size of Lake Erie.
Light a single candle that illuminates the earth..............and at least three surrounding planets, using only three quarts of oil from inside a single room. The candle may not be taken outside into the open: Use your spirit.